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18 YO in a Tesla Clocked at 118 MPH in a 25 MPH Zone, Instant Torque FTW

If this were to happen during medieval times (that would have to be a very fast horse, I know, but bear with me, it will kind of make sense shortly) and the punishment for speeding was stoning, then this guy could very easily come out of it unscathed.
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How, you ask? All he'd have to do was to open his mouth and say, "let he who has never gone over the speed limit in his entire life be the first to cast his stone”. Of course, if he was gagged for the execution, the story would have a very different outcome (unless he was a god at playing mime), but let's assume he wasn't.

Indeed, I think none of us can honestly say we've never strayed at least one bit beyond the speed limits enforced by the law, either by will or by accident, and if some of us could, our offender would still be in the clear because those people are too old and weak to throw a stone with any intent anyway. We speed, and that's just how things stand.

Law enforcers seem to be aware of this - of course they are, they too speed even when not wearing the uniform - which is why they're very likely to be lenient toward somebody going five miles over the limit. That can be an honest mistake and, besides, it's not particularly dangerous in most cases. How about 93 miles (150 km) over the limit, then?

It's what a young Canadian teen was caught doing in Newtown, Ohio, at the wheel of their Tesla electric vehicle. The 18-year-old was clocked at 118 mph (190 km/h) in a 25 mph (40 km/h) zone, according to cincinnati.com, but since the police didn't manage to stop him right away and he traveled a little further, the ticket was issued based on the readings at that moment: 101 mph (162 km/h) in a 35 mph (56 km/h) sector.

To make matters worse, the offender was reportedly also using Snapchat at the same time, which is like keeping a few sticks of dynamite in your pants on top of lighting a match while standing knee-high in gasoline. However, I'm sure somebody has tried to do that as well already, so it shouldn't really surprise us.

The incident happened just before 2 a.m., which is probably why we're even talking about a speeding ticket and not a full-blown tragedy. The empty streets meant lower chances of anyone and anything jumping in front of the fast-moving EV, which is probably the only positive twist to this whole story.

The Newtown Police Department, speaking through Chief Tom Synan, did not disclose the name of the driver, but did say they were from Cambridge, Ontario. The driver has been cited with reckless operation of a vehicle, though one might feel as though no punishment can quite fit the crime in this case.

So, where does Tesla come into all this? It's not really Tesla per se as much as any other performance EV out there capable of the kind of blistering-quick accelerations that were previously only achievable in a highly-modified sports car. The electric powertrain has essentially liberalized this kind of performance levels for the masses, with the only remaining hurdle being the somewhat expensive price.

Still, compare buying an off-the-shelf Model 3 Performance to getting something like a Hellcat and having it extensively modified and it won't only be more affordable, but also a lot less of a hassle. Plus, the kind of people who put that much effort in their vehicles tend to be a lot more responsible with their actions, meaning you're much more likely to see them at the drag strip than going like lunatics down a boulevard.

Like the free use of so-called "self-driving" tech (and this one applies strictly to Tesla), the availability of fast-accelerating regular cars is something we're going to have to get used to live with. Or, if you're feeling particularly morbid, even die by.

Editor's note: Tesla Model S and X Plaid images used for illustrative purposes

 
 
 
 
 

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