Driven: 2023 BMW M2: Why Not Take the Sports Car Camping?

These two events, in conjunction with my ownership of an E46 M3 I treated as an extension of my mortal coil, have created some juxtaposed ideas about BMW’s new car.

All of those are just my own personal, often anecdotal thoughts on a car that has a somewhat muddled vision, to begin with. The M2 has a reputation for being “The Driver’s Car” of the M lineup. Conversely, other M products, like the new XM, are no longer so focused in vision. The kids may not be alright, so to say. The current design aesthetics are evidence enough of that. Pile that onto what is a very divisive car following the much-loved first album, and one’s picture of the new G87-generation M2 becomes about as clear as the skies over New York right now.

But enough mixing metaphors and fancy words. At the end of the day, I drove a new BMW M2 through some of the most diverse biomes the western United States has to offer, from 4,000 feet above sea level to 11,700 feet above sea level, crossing some 1,200+ miles on the way, in addition to basically living out of it with my best friend. How was it?

Design Evaluation

As it turns out, you’ll spend a lot of time looking at a car when you go to drive it some 900 miles from Denver, Colorado, to Moab, Utah, and back. So let’s start there. Frankly – and this shouldn’t have to be said about an M car – it works better in person. The grille isn’t as gaudy as one might think looking at the car on your phone screen, and if anything, it fades into the background. The wheels are attractive, despite my severe distaste for any wheel with the played-out black-and-machine-turned-face. The big M brakes look killer, too.

The piece that really steals the show are the huge, boxy fenders. I cannot think of another new car on sale today with fenders like this. They’re incredible. We’ll avoid that awful, cliched, and sexist line that inevitably draws comparison to hips. Instead, I refer you to the reactions of the Populus Moab. Anyone who cared to comment on the car said the flares were their favorite part. Very Deutsche Tourenwagen Meisters. Personally, I find the car has tons of interesting little geometries that you’d never notice unless you were taking close-ups with a camera.

Take the little “box” at the rear housing the parking sensor and a marker light (look for the “!” shape). It’s interesting if viewed through a lens in isolation – far more so than the lines on a lot of new sporty cars, but it looks a bit tacked on when viewed in totality. Browse through the gallery to see what I’m talking about.

That’s where some of its problems begin. This M2 is not a pretty thing. Personally, an M car ought to blend into the background a bit more, with some cool touches and a little “if-you-know-you-know” in there for the enthusiasts. Other lauded M cars haven’t been pretty per se (E60 M5). But the designs always have cohesion. This does not. It’s so painfully clear the lines are there to generate likes, not to be liked. Which it does. This car kills on social media. A sports car for the digital generation.

BMW’s current design ethos is a great way to make sure every gas station chat is an interesting one. If you want to be gawked at by the locals, especially in Moab, where the sportiest thing I saw was a 911 Cab, then the M2 is the car for you. Decide for yourself if that breaks from the M ethos – or more importantly – your own.

Interior Assessment

I’ve spent a lot of time with new BMW interiors, and this is by far my favorite. The driving position is just so, and everything falls readily to hand. BMW loves a fat wheel, however, and I don’t. It bothered me in my E46, and it bothers me here. What this car does do well is swallow cargo. Some have made the point that the roof is an inch or two lower at the rear, cutting your ability to haul people. That’s true. But things? Lord, you can haul pretty much all of them.

Below is a photo of all the gear I was able to load into the M2. We fit (deep breath) a hard-sided cooler, two tents, two cots, luggage for two people/four days, a camp stove with cooking supplies, collapsible sink, Bluetooth speaker, backpack, two camp chairs, a cord of firewood, and camera gear. I bet we could’ve fit even more if we wanted to camp more luxuriously.

We even toyed with bringing a pop-up shelter and projector but decided against it because our camp site was too small. All this fit without using the roof rack. Even with the carbon fiber roof optioned, BMW leaves the mounting points for a roof rack should you wish to really take the practicality of this already practical car to the next level. I like that.

Previously, my bar for practical sports cars was my E46. It, too, swallowed gear, and I could fit my mountain bike either in it, albeit with a wheel off or on the roof if I so desired. Those 13 cubic feet of cargo space in the new M2 is more than enough. There’s also room for things up front, like my big 32oz water bottle, the infotainment works beautifully, and the cabin is quiet at some absurd and allegedly triple-digit speeds. Still, give me buttons or give me death. I want physical climate controls. Don’t be cheap, BMW.

For reference, the previous M2 was just as competent, which means that while this car is heavier, the F87 M2 hauled just as much cargo. Both hold 13.8 cubic feet of cargo. Honestly, there’s no reason this interior couldn’t be something you live with every day of your life, especially if you mind your choice in seat. More on that in a bit.

Driving Take

While driving to Moab, I racked up scores of highway miles in the new M2. What it feels like there is categorically different from what it feels like to drive the car on your favorite piece of back road. That split personality is a trait M cars have had for a while, and one that I worship.

The problem is that the M2 is a fat, slovenly thing despite its size. It tips the scales at a one-more-slice-please 3,814 lbs (1,730 kg). Back in 2016, the then-new F87 M2 weighed damn near four HUNDRED pounds less (3,450). I cannot for the life of me understand how this car weighs nearly as much as some M4s. Perhaps lead was used for sound deadening. The carbon buckets save 24 lbs. (11 kg), not that it matters. More likely, legislative changes the world over have necessitated heavier tech for more safety features and better emissions, which is always a valid argument for a car getting tubby.

There’s another reason this car may be so fat. You. I’m not calling anyone fat, but I am calling people wimps. Telling your dealer the last M2 rode too harshly or that it was too loud at 80 mph on your way to the dentist has a direct effect on how isolated a car becomes the next time ‘round. So, if you want comfy, don’t buy an M car. If you keep telling BMW your M car is too loud, harsh, etc., then you’re part of the reason the new M2 is on the wrong side of 3,500 pounds. It’s a sports car. There will be compromise. Don’t let that compromise be the fact that this car can’t cross some small bridges. Don’t let that compromise make your car the butt of “Yo Mama” jokes at Cars and Coffee.

So, while that extra lard in the M2’s already wide waist does add some luxury to the experience, and thus my time with it on the highway, I’d rather be a little uncomfortable and have the car drive lighter on a back road. This brings me to my return from Moab. Initially, I thought the car was far too competent – a far cry from the tail-happy M2 that debuted nearly a decade ago. It was difficult to have fun in the car under its limit. Having gotten on some roads I know well, that changed.

The M2 is absolutely Down With The Thiccness, yet hides it well thanks to a very quick automatic transmission, two turbos, and huge 20x10.5-inch rear wheels. Grip is immense, though a short jab of the throttle mid-corner lets you have some safe-ish fun. You can really dial that in with the M traction control settings. They’re complicated, and finding the right setup takes time, but you’ve only got to do it once. Just don’t start at 0.

BMW has made massive improvements over the M240i’s weak points for this generation M2- as it should be. I found the M240i’s steering to be disastrous and something someone should see some time for, like so many sensitive documents left on the floor of a Florida bathroom. It never communicated when the back began to rotate, leading to some roadside pants changing. The M2 communes with you much better. It does a lot better, in fact, despite my incessant complaining and jesting about the weight.

The inline six is classic BMW. There’s still some of that buzz in the exhaust note that was so prevalent in the E46 M3. It is sewing machine smooth, and the turbos are masters of torque (even if there are hilarious amounts of lag below 3,000 rpm). I love the low driving position, and the pedal placement would be ideal for heel-toe downshifts if you get the stick (do, as BMW just killed the manual).

There’s an incredible sense of flow to these rear-drive, two-door BMWs deliver. The way you drive this car is almost ritualistic. It’s a Gregorian chant at 100 miles an hour. You mash down through the gears as the engine hums down through the rev range, its deceleration punctuated by slight barks and rumbles. Then, as the car tips in, the tires begin to take the (fat) load. Carefully balancing the throttle to stay out of the traction control or the bushes, and the steering tells you where the grip levels are beginning to drop. Roll that pedal on while keeping the engine speed above three grand, then wait for the next corner to do it over again. It’s intoxicating, and the sensations are something unique to BMW and to the brand’s smallest M cars.

Everyday Living

You’ll notice the weight of the car during this Gregorian chant of a driving experience, but that disappears at more sensible driving speeds. Anywhere you have to mind the speed limit, the M2 is just a car. As said above, that’s what makes an M car an M car in my mind.

While camping, it never felt like we were taking the loaded catapult that is the M2 to the store. It’s just a car. It gets good gas mileage for what it is. We saw an average of 26 mpg across our trip from Denver to Moab. I imagine the stick is a few off this number.

Impressive as that is, BMW’s carbon seats should only be ordered by those who intend to track the car frequently. Skipping the Carbon Package drops the MSRP by $9,900. The M2 you want for everyday use costs just $65,050 with the manual and the comfy seats. Use those savings to get the M Driver’s Pack. That ups your speed to the true 177 mph limit, and you get a track day with BMW. Lord knows you’ll need it. I do this for a living and I’d still take it. The more track-oriented spec with the carbon seats, roof, and automatic transmission I had totaled $76,845.

No matter your spec, the M2 remains one thing: a usable, practical sports car you can get in and drive every day, then get nutty with on the weekend. Much like my beloved M3, I imagine this car slowly becomes something you cannot detach from yourself. See again: the magic of the two-door, rear-drive BMW coupe. The recipe is fantastic for those needing a single car solution, even if that extension of your body happens to have some stubborn back fat.

Test Drive Roundup

Where does this leave the M2 and me? I’m honestly still pretty darn confused. On the one hand, I love it for what it is – practical, fast as hell, fun, and engaging. A strong second album. Led Zepplin II. On the other, I despise what weight has done to one of my favorite recipes in the automotive space.

Despite the moaning of a die-hard BMW fan wearing rose-tinted glasses, the BMW M2 is a hell of a machine. It competes with cars nothing like it (Audi RS3) and comes out as my personal favorite. It’s pricier than a Supra and delivers on the extra cost, too. If anyone figures out how to make intermittent fasting work on sports cars, call me.

Pros:

• Absurd practicality
• Beautiful inline-six engine
• Still offers a manual (!!)
• The killer second album
• Competitive pricing

Cons:

• Fat
• Fat
• Fat
• Fat
• I hit my sensitive parts on the carbon seats
• Fat