No Wonder Stellantis Isn’t Shutting Chrysler Down, People Keep Buying Their Cars

Just look at how far the industry has come over this past decade alone. You have more money being invested in European budget cars than Stellantis/FCA has invested in the Chrysler brand in recent years. In fact, I think I’m going to start calling Chrysler “Zombie Plymouth” for the duration of this 100% completely objective and non-biased editorial piece.

I can already feel the outrage... coming from three or four of you. Keep in mind, I don’t hate Zombie Plymouth. I had a diesel-powered 300C daily driver about 12 years ago at work, and I kind of enjoyed it. However, we need to be realistic and understand that resources matter for both carmakers and buyers alike, and while the two currently available Zombie Plymouth models on sale today are doing shockingly well numbers-wise, it’s hard to make a case for buying either a Pacifica/Voyager or a 300 sedan over any of their direct rivals.

Let’s start with the minivans, because those are Zombie Plymouth's bread and butter. The Pacifica and the Voyager are basically the same vehicle and if we look at Pacifica sales over the first half of 2021, there it is as runner-up to the best-selling Toyota Sienna with 47,571 units sold, while the Sienna found 57,642 owners. Then there’s the Honda Odyssey with 47,556 units sold and that’s pretty much it in terms of solid numbers – the Kia Carnival isn’t doing too well.

I know what you’re thinking. The Pacifica is available as a plug-in hybrid, and for that reason alone it keeps being relevant. However, its powertrain only allows for 32 miles (50 km) of EV range and that number is going to go down considerably once you utilize the MPV to the best of its abilities – packed with kids, dogs and luggage.

Alright, fine. I can give the Pacifica a break if it means that much to you, but it’s still nearly impossible to argue in favor of keeping a car brand going with just one reasonably popular product on hand. This isn’t Bugatti.

As for the Chrysler 300, well, can you believe that it’s the fourth-best selling large sedan in the U.S. in H1 of 2021? If we forget premium models like the Mercedes E-Class and BMW 5 Series (second and third respectively), the Chrysler 300 is suddenly the second best-selling model among its rivals, behind the Dodge Charger.

In other words, more people are buying the 300 over the likes of the Toyota Avalon, Nissan Maxima, Cadillac CT5 and Tesla Model S.

What’s that you say? The 2021 Chrysler 300S is cool because it has a V8? Yeah, a 5.7-liter V8 rated at just 363 hp. It'll get you to 60 mph (97 kph) in 6.3 seconds for $42,490. For that money, you can get the 2021 Dodge Charger Scat Pack with a 6.4-liter HEMI V8 rated at 485 hp. It’s a full two seconds quicker to 60 mph than the flagship Chrysler 300S.

Performance aside, just consider all the available convenience and active safety tech you get in say, a Toyota Avalon or a Nissan Maxima. The 300 does have adaptive cruise control, collision warning and lane departure warning, but that’s pretty much it – and it requires that you pay extra for the SafetyTec Plus Group so that you pretty much have the same safety features as a 10-year-old Volvo.

Zombie Plymouth has made some really solid cars over the years, but almost none of them truly popular or considerably superior to their direct competitors. The 1956 Chrysler Imperial was pretty cool, featuring the world’s first all-transistor radio for an extra $150. The LeBaron was somewhat popular and so was the Town & Country, obviously. But good cars were hard to find, especially in the past few decades.

Let’s see: the Sebring was dreadful despite strong sales, the 200 didn’t represent the best of investments, the PT Cruiser was a joke and the Aspen, a sales fiasco. You can make the case for the 300 being the best overall Chrysler model in history, but that’s something you’d want to emphasize if this was 2011, not 2021.

At one point, Stellantis will have to reassess its brand portfolio and the likes of Jeep and Ram are obviously untouchable, as is Dodge, probably. Chrysler on the other hand, it’s tough to imagine them still going strong a decade from now.