Jeep GC Trackhawk Proves V8 Habits Die Hard and Hit Hard on the Dragstrip

Although it seems that the race happened some time ago – given the host's non-hibernal attire – on the familiar Toronto location, the video is the final treat for this year from the drag strip regular Sam. Nonetheless, another episode of the "European vs American" race series is between a very yellow Italian and two more blandly colored counterparts.

Still, this is not about looks – drag races never are – and the beauty queen can stick to its pageant, as there's no rest for the wicked in the quarter-mile sprint. Although, on paper, things appear to be as far apart from reality as a JDM is from pacing the Indy 500.

Right: one Maserati Levante Modena S, one BMW X4M, one Jeep Grand Cherokee Trackhawk, and one long straight ribbon of tarmac. Name the event. Correct, a duel – a two-way contest (and this isn't a basic grammar or vocabulary mistake). It is a duel, as the third party is there just for numbers' sake, and it pretty much doesn't count at the end of the 1,320-foot-long dash.

Going from the highest horsepower down, the Trackhawk is as ready to spread its V8 awe as ever. 6.2 liters of supercharged All-American HEMI put down 707 hp (717 PS) and 645 lb-ft of torque (875 Nm). All four wheels get the steroid treatment – this is an SUV-only event – so the 5,364 lbs. (2.4 tons) of Trackhawk are very fast off the line. The eight-speed automatic is there for good measure (and keeping the transmission in one piece).

From the old side of the Atlantic, the German-Italian alliance sees a rather odd combination. In the Saxon corner, the BMW packs the least impressive weapon of the bunch. A three-liter inline-six and its pair of turbos spit out 503 hp (510 PS) and a lowly 479 lb-ft of spin force (650 Nm). Also all-wheel-driven, the Beemer counts eight forward gears in its automatic speed-altering box and weighs in at a full tank of gas over two tons.

Lastly, the flamboyant Maserati packs a twin-turbo V8 that confines 3.8 liters of combustion chamber might. It drives all four wheels through an eight-speed automatic, sits on top of 543 horses (551 European PS), and brags with an off-the-line force of 538 lb-ft (730 Nm).

A risk assessment based on paper figures would entrust the Trackhawk with the documents of surrender - to pass them over and have them signed by the Europeans. And the Italian quickly submits to this sentence, losing all races in a manner that can only be described as non-combat.

However, the German puts up a fight (although massively outgunned), and the Jeep gets its money's worth from the races. It takes the first dig run, leaving the other two rounds to the 200+ hp-stronger Grand Cherokee. But the lightweight BMW takes both 32 mph and 50 mph roll races (50 kph and 80 kph), and thus, the overall triumph.

Some might argue that it's not just the car that matters; the driver's skills and reaction times can turn the tables. However, the automatic gearbox setups leave little room for piloting, and the launches are imperceptibly close to each other. Also, out of five races, the Maserati is consistently falling behind. In the words of the great Bugs Bunny, that's all, folks! For this year… See you in 2023 with more ICE!