1,300-HP Onslaught: VW Golf R Drag Races Audi RS 3 Until 'Rear Diff Has Left the Chat'

Japan is the other nation that built a cult around some seriously aggressive hatchbacks, and for all the good reasons, but the Germans have been at it for decades: Audi, BMW, Mercedes, Opel, and VW – all have at least one example to brag about. And, in the good German tradition, the closer the family ties, the more heated the hatred. Take Audi and VW – the Lord of the Four Rings is more performance-inclined than its blue-collared brethren, usually serving the commoners.

However, VW made one exception from that rule of thumb when it put out the hot Golfs of the past – the GTIs and Rs that are a far cry from the regular, everyday, normal hatchback they’re based on. Not willing to let the accolades fall entirely on VW's shoulders, Audi stepped in when the A3 platform was drafted and put through the ‘special forces’ training, coming out on the other end as the RS 3.

And that’s what we have here: a Golf Mk 7.5 R stretching its legs against ‘the fastest RS 3 in the world’ (by world, the owner understands the Dragy records). The rules are pretty straightforward: rolling races followed by standing quarter-mile sprints. Whoever gets across the finish line first wins – England doesn’t believe in Elapsed Times. If you’re first, you have bragging rights, period.

‘Officially Gassed’ is the YouTube channel responsible for this odd-cylinder happening: four on the Golf, five on the Audi. Since the vloggers don’t do stock, preferring instead the high-adrenaline tones of aftermarket tunes, the two cars proudly sit among the most unassuming sleepers on the right of the Atlantic.

Both fighters punch high above their factory-rated weight: the 2.0-liter turbocharged Golf puts down over 100% more power than VW intended. 650 hp (659 PS) and 531 lb-ft (720 Nm) is a love letter from four cylinders to four wheels, sent via a dual-clutch seven-speed gearbox messenger pigeon. Conversely, the Audi is confident that 649 PS and 750 Nm (640 hp and 553 lb-ft) can bring the fight to the R and win the Golf war.

However, the premium hot hatchback has three extra doors over the VW, which translates into a 100-kg (220-lb) handicap. In absolute terms, the RS 3 is 35 bhp/ton (407) under the Golf (442), which could weigh decisively at the far end of the 1,320-foot-long debate. But, given the amount of tuning received by both contestants, a win is only as good as the muscle-up job.

However, the tuning in the VW vastly exceeds the work put into the Audi – see the photo above this paragraph for a comparison between the mods installed in each car. And, with 20% less displacement and one cylinder down on the Audi, the VW needed all the extra steroids to level up. Considering that the outputs were not in the same category in their factory form, the Golf has come a long way. The 2.5-liter Audi came with 400 PS (395 hp) in stock form, while the Volkswagen had to settle for 90 PS less (310 PS/306 hp).

The Audi gets a free lesson in rolling start speed and acceleration, albeit it doesn’t fall far behind the winner – the Golf R takes two out of the three stages of this first round. The less pretentious badge puts the power down better, taking 6.13 seconds to double its speed from 100 kph (62 mph) to 200 kph (124 mph). The RS 3 is a whisker behind at 6.19 seconds – a blink too late.

The drag race is the yardstick by which all 10-second performances are measured, and the two cars stay true to the closeness of their tune-up numbers. The RS 3 again lags behind the Golf R by three-hundredths of a second (10.69 v 10.72) over the finish line. Speed-wise, the two step-twins are just as close: the three-door Volkswagen registered a 133.25 mph terminal velocity (214.39 kph), while the Audi got the upper hand here, with 133.39 (214.62 kph).

However, this round is plagued by the dark side of motor tuning. In the first race, the Audi locks the rear brakes and holds on for dear life, leaving the Golf R to run alone and take the flag without any real effort. In the second leg, the hot Golf performs a hara-kiri on its Haldex 5 multi-plate clutch that sends torque to the rear axle, and the VW throws the towel. After all, there’s a perfect reason for which America firmly believes nothing replaces displacement (except forced induction, nitrous oxide, and electricity).