Photo: nwfdailynews.com
Yeah, you might not have heard of Godpilot yet, but that's only because you spend all your time reading crap on websites such as this one instead of dressing up nicely and going to church every Sunday.
You probably think that Tesla has the best semi-autonomous driving system in its Autopilot, which only goes to show how ignorant you really are about the car industry. The truth is that all cars come with a self-driving feature, you just have to open up and let it enter into your heart. Saying a hallelujah helps. And when you really want to get the full benefits, all you need to do is close your eyes.
What makes this Godpilot ten times better than Autopilot is that you can do it at any speed, in any type of intersection and on any road, marked or not. Wherever you activate it, the same thing will happen: absolutely nothing. Which, depending on the situation and how violent your death may be, makes keeping those eyes closed a very good idea.
A 28-year-old woman decided to activate this feature just before an intersection where she had a stop sign. She did everything right, eyes closed and all, but after miraculously cruising through the crossroad unharmed, her luck finally ran out as she slammed the vehicle into a house in Mary Esther.
Nobody in the house was injured and, judging by how the car looks, the woman was probably unharmed too, even though the nwfdailynews report says she was taken to hospital for evaluation. It doesn't say what kind of hospital or evaluation, so let's hope it's something that starts with "psy" and ends with "chiatry."
You think we're being too harsh? Well, what would you say to a woman that had just run your minivan full of kids off the road if she came up with the excuse of having her eyes closed for praying, like this lady over here did? You'd probably give her some more reasons to pray, that's what.
Still, let's stop and think for a while and imagine what would have happened if she had been a user of Allahpilot. She would have had to leave the wheel altogether, extend a little rug and start bowing toward Mecca. Which is pretty difficult to do in a moving vehicle that keeps changing its position.
What makes this Godpilot ten times better than Autopilot is that you can do it at any speed, in any type of intersection and on any road, marked or not. Wherever you activate it, the same thing will happen: absolutely nothing. Which, depending on the situation and how violent your death may be, makes keeping those eyes closed a very good idea.
A 28-year-old woman decided to activate this feature just before an intersection where she had a stop sign. She did everything right, eyes closed and all, but after miraculously cruising through the crossroad unharmed, her luck finally ran out as she slammed the vehicle into a house in Mary Esther.
Nobody in the house was injured and, judging by how the car looks, the woman was probably unharmed too, even though the nwfdailynews report says she was taken to hospital for evaluation. It doesn't say what kind of hospital or evaluation, so let's hope it's something that starts with "psy" and ends with "chiatry."
You think we're being too harsh? Well, what would you say to a woman that had just run your minivan full of kids off the road if she came up with the excuse of having her eyes closed for praying, like this lady over here did? You'd probably give her some more reasons to pray, that's what.
Still, let's stop and think for a while and imagine what would have happened if she had been a user of Allahpilot. She would have had to leave the wheel altogether, extend a little rug and start bowing toward Mecca. Which is pretty difficult to do in a moving vehicle that keeps changing its position.
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