No one gets that excited for a 7-seater drag race because they're meant to fit a large family, not to take care of your need for speed. But at the end of the day, after you've safely dropped your kids off at school, and it's just you and the SUV, why not (legally) floor it when you have to? After all, having power under the hood and not using it is like being a warrior in a garden instead of a gardener in a war.
Our family-friendly sleeping giants of the day are the 2023 Mercedes-Benz GLE 450, the 2023 Mazda CX-90 Turbo S Premium Plus, and the coveted 2023 BMW X5 40i. They all have advantages and disadvantages, so let's see who comes out on top and if it's worth its weight in gas. (I would have gone with gold instead of gas, but not even the W16 Mistral is worth that).
Starting with the pretentious GLE 450, it comes rocking a 3.0-liter inline-6 engine with mild hybrid drive that can output 362 hp (367 ps) with 369 lb-ft (500 Nm) of torque.
On paper, it weighs 5,013 lbs. (2,273 kg), and it can get from 0 to 60 in 5.5 seconds. Speaking of paper, the standard version starts from $66,450, but if you want the 3rd row Seat Package, that will run you another $2,100.
And if you want to go for the AMG Line Exterior with the 20-inch AMG twin 5-spoke wheels and Sports Exhaust System, you'll have to fork over almost $80k.
Photo: throttle house yt channel
Next up, the Mazda CX-90 Turbo S Premium Plus can fit up to 8 passengers. They didn't mention the actual size of these passengers, but where there's a will, there's a way.
This SUV boasts an e-SKYACTIV 3.3-liter inline-6 engine that can output 340 hp (345 ps) with 369 lb-ft (500 Nm) of torque. It weighs 4,903 lbs. (2,224 kg) and has a top speed of 210 mph (338 kph).
While this Turbo S Premium version starts at around $62,000, the most modest out of the eight trims is the 3.3-liter Turbo Select with 280 hp (284 ps) and 332 lb-ft (450 Nm) of torque that comes in at around $41,000.
Last but certainly not least is the 2023 BMW X5 40i with another 3.0-liter inline six, capable of delivering 335 hp (340 ps) with 330 lb-ft (447 Nm) of torque. The model from the video costs around $76,000.
Photo: throttle house yt channel
If we compare it to the 2024 model, we'll notice a slight difference in power. The BMW M TwinPower Turbo inline 6-cylinder engine can deliver 375 hp (380 ps) with 398 lb-ft (540 Nm) of torque. The cheapest model starts from $65,200 and can hit 60 in 5.3 seconds. But if you want the top-of-the-line, that would be the 4.4-liter V8 523-hp M60i which costs $90,295 and gets to 60 in 4.1 seconds.
After the customary exhaust sound check, they were off to the races, and as predicted by many of you by now, the BMW took the 1st spot, while the GLE came in 2nd, and the Mazda way behind in 3rd.
A roll race ensued, where surprise, surprise, the X5 won again, but not by such a margin as in the drag race. The Mercedes came in second again, and the Mazda in a close third.
Seeing no point in going on like that, they brought a surprise contender, the 2023 Hyundai Palisade, which is an odd choice, because it has much less power than the rest of the SUVs.
Photo: throttle house yt channel
The Palisade is rocking a 3.8-liter V6 that produces 291 hp with 262 lb-ft (355 Nm), weighs 4,356 lbs., and costs almost $54,000.
They only raced the Hyundai against the Mazda CX-90, but because it lost to the least performant car from the trio, it would have been pointless for the Throttle House organizers to race all four of them.
Getting back to the main event, the moral of the day is that while the Mazda didn't take home a single piece of bacon, it was still the overall favorite, given that it's $11,000 cheaper than the GLE and 14,000 grand more affordable than the BMW.
Obviously, there are other factors to consider, like handling, gas mileage, and reliability, but pound for pound, the CX-90 was the one to look out for that day on that 1/4-mile Canadian drag strip.
Codrin just loves American classics, from the 1940s and ‘50s, all the way to the muscle cars of the '60s and '70s. In his perfect world, we'll still see Hudsons and Road Runners roaming the streets for years to come (even in EV form, if that's what it takes to keep the aesthetic alive). Full profile
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