The LOL of the Day Is Brought to You by EMP Shield

The official website says that “EMP Shield is the World’s first EMP protection technology for an entire home and vehicle tested to military and UL 1449 standards from ETL.” Not only that, but also, “EMP Shield is designed to protect an entire home from lightning, solar flare (coronal mass ejection), power surges, and an electromagnetic pulse.”

In other words, this little box starting from $389, is supposed to protect everyone from that entire list of extreme threats. To some, maybe that would sound like sort of a magical anti-doomsday device, but one that’s on sale.

The device from the Reddit post is meant for ICE vehicles. It has three wires, a negative and positive one that you hook up to your car's battery and a grounding wire that you just attach to the car itself. No EV EMP Shield, for now, I'm afraid, but keep those fingers crossed.

The website doesn’t mention how exactly this box works except that “This is accomplished by shunting (shorting) the over voltage coming in from the grid and the induced voltage that is collected within your home.” To some folk, this may sound more like a power surge protector in a best-case scenario. It might even sound like a scam.

However, to other people, 1,548 to be exact, this is the product of their dreams. Those 1,548 are the people who left a five-star review on the official website about how satisfied they are with the EMP Shield.

For example, someone said, “I am excited to have peace of mind having my vehicles covered.” Another person stated, “BE Prepared with EMP Shield. If the government is putting these on there vehicles, you can bet something is coming that will disable your vehicle, UNLESS YOU HAVE EMP Shield.” That sounds very confident, to say the least. And not at all in a conspiracy-tin-foil-hat kind of way.

In any case, all 78 pages of customer reviews are filled only with five-star ratings. This must be some product...

Far be it from me to loosely use the words "propaganda advertising," but let’s have a quick look at other incentives from the website, for why we should all buy an EMP Shield.

“Why Do I Need EMP Shield? The Government has released an EMP Executive order & Homeland Security is urging people to get prepared quickly!” One could say that this style of fear-inducing advertisement is reminiscent of the Cold War era, where there was always the fear of a nuke going off at any time.

Another interesting point the website is trying to make is that “Although the grid may be down, your electrical equipment and home will still be functional if you have EMP Shield.” At the same time, actual researchers say that at this point, if everything else is down, there’s not much use for your car.

And if your car somehow makes it through a city-wide blackout, gas pumps are also out. Unless you’re a prepper hoarding gallons upon gallons of gas, you’re only going to get as far as your gas tank will let you... in this very specific scenario where you're driving as an EMP hits.

Also, there’s a high probability that if this were to actually happen, it would be from a nuke detonating at a high altitude. And if such an attack was to ever occur on United States soil, I only have three words: “mutual global annihilation.” Not much use then for this 5-out-of-5 magic box, wouldn’t you say?

Also, would it be out of the realm of reason if one were to think that this kind of device would already be in use by local authorities, the local power grid, schools, public transportation institutions, the Government itself, and so on?

How come cars don’t already come fitted with one, ordered by legislation even? And is Elon Musk keeping his version of it on the down low for some nefarious reason? Could all this be a big conspiracy?

Or maybe, just maybe, you've never heard of such a thing because logic would dictate a simpler answer. Let’s not speculate, but better yet, read some of the remarks from Reddit. Maybe they hold the wisdom for understanding this entire debacle.

To the question of "what’s inside the box," one user replied that there’s nothing more than “Probably a fancy-looking circuit board that just powers the light.” Coincidence or not, there is no non-destructive way to actually open the box. It's sealed shut.

Another particularly funny reply would be, “Probably even easier to just live your life knowing that if your future depends on your car not being disabled by an emp, then you have bigger problems.”

The last one I chose says: “Also, if it turns into a scavenger situation, wouldn’t you want to avoid using the car since it’ll make you a target for thieves?” You gotta love it when people make absolute sense of a change in a comment section.

There’s absolutely no need for me to end this article with any form of a conclusion, given that to “some,” this “may” sound extremely ridiculous. I’m talking "Snake oil" ridiculous.