Photo: The Independent
If there will ever be a Third Wold War, its origins will surely have some sort of connection with parking. There's nothing that brings out the worst in people more effectively than finding a spot in which to leave your car.
I'm willing to bet that by this time, even if cities somehow found a magical way of providing enough parking spaces for everyone, we'd still fight over them, no matter how abundant. It's just so well entrenched in our fabric that it's probably the first thing our genes pass over to our offsprings. Hair color? Number of fingers? Forget about that, genetics, just make sure you make them fight over parking.
And as bad as the situation is everywhere, nobody has it worse than the most crowded cities of this world. Take London, for example. It's not enough that you have to pay for the privilege of actually driving through the town center, but you also have to spend money on parking. And don't imagine that these financial constraints mean that there's plenty to choose from - you'd think so, but you'd be wrong.
So when you finally find somewhere safe to leave your car, decide to skip lunch that day so you can afford it, and go about your business, your patience is basically stretched as far as it can go. Any added drop and the glass is going to spill. How exactly that happens is up to anyone's choice, but it usually involves some kind of violence, be it verbal or, in worst cases (or best, if there's anyone around to film it), physical.
Then there's the often ignored path of the passive aggression. If done right, it can be just as satisfying as smacking the source of your anger in the face, but it takes time and practice to master it. Shouting obscene words is easy, throwing fists around comes natural, but masking a threat in a seemingly harmless note? That requires skill.
This smart fortwo driver from London could clearly write a book about it. When crammed into his parking spot by a Mercedes-Benz, he came up with the perfect message for the inconsiderate driver. He wrote: "You are very brave parking your nice Merc so close to my smart car which I don't five a sh*t about!!!" Would he have been just as effective by writing: "Move your expensive car or I'll scratch it"? Probably, but he wouldn't have been featured on the Independent's website, nor on ours.
And as bad as the situation is everywhere, nobody has it worse than the most crowded cities of this world. Take London, for example. It's not enough that you have to pay for the privilege of actually driving through the town center, but you also have to spend money on parking. And don't imagine that these financial constraints mean that there's plenty to choose from - you'd think so, but you'd be wrong.
So when you finally find somewhere safe to leave your car, decide to skip lunch that day so you can afford it, and go about your business, your patience is basically stretched as far as it can go. Any added drop and the glass is going to spill. How exactly that happens is up to anyone's choice, but it usually involves some kind of violence, be it verbal or, in worst cases (or best, if there's anyone around to film it), physical.
Then there's the often ignored path of the passive aggression. If done right, it can be just as satisfying as smacking the source of your anger in the face, but it takes time and practice to master it. Shouting obscene words is easy, throwing fists around comes natural, but masking a threat in a seemingly harmless note? That requires skill.
This smart fortwo driver from London could clearly write a book about it. When crammed into his parking spot by a Mercedes-Benz, he came up with the perfect message for the inconsiderate driver. He wrote: "You are very brave parking your nice Merc so close to my smart car which I don't five a sh*t about!!!" Would he have been just as effective by writing: "Move your expensive car or I'll scratch it"? Probably, but he wouldn't have been featured on the Independent's website, nor on ours.
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