On Ferrari and Douchebags

Our sublime automotive universe has just as many unspoken rules as it has cars and one of the best of these rules is that Ferraris act like a douchebag magnet.
We've all seen it - the overnight Instagram star who goes out and buys a Fezza thinking it's some sort of official stamp on the paper confirming he's made it big. You really can't miss these guys. Even if you try to stay away from them, you'll be assaulted by people talking about them a week later when they park their supercar upside down in a ditch.

You don't even have to be affluent in order to become such a rotten apple. That's because every important city on this planet is packed with tons of Ferrari-branded merchandise. And you see tons of people who think it's cool to dress themselves or their offsprings in Ferrari shoes, Ferrari pants and Ferrari T-shirts, all at the same time.

And the towns that don't have this get small fairs where people buy and sell... unofficial Ferrari merchandise. In fact, I've devised a little survey on this. It's all about having to make a selection - the subject must choose between a mid-spec Huawei phone with an original Ferrari cover and a range-toping Samsung phone wearing a non-branded cover.

I haven't put this into practice, but I'm willing to bet I would find enough people who would go for the horsie visual. I know I might need to polish this survey since there may be some for whom the Huawei would do the trick even with a fake Prancing Horse cover.

Nevertheless, it's not Maranello's fault that human nature has brought us here. When Enzo Ferrari materialised his dreams back in the day, he didn't build a university meant to educate the population on automotive matters. The man created a company so that he could sustain his racing activities.

And just like Enzo didn't exactly enjoy making road cars for the profanes, nowadays Ferrari doesn't enjoy producing caps for wannabes. But this brings profit and keeps the business alive.

The douche issue applies to pretty much every big brand out there and with Ferrari being No. One, it was only natural for the world to come to such a situation.

Sure, you won't see posers walking around dressed in Mclaren T-Shirts. But give these Brits another decade of market presence and their merchandise will certainly spread past the borders of aficionado land.

Even Porsche, whose sportscars have to be driven in order to be understood, couldn't escape the issue of fake people wearing its badge on their clothes.

Speaking of these Germans made me think of the late Steve Jobs and his passion for the 911 Turbo. I don't think anybody imagines Jobs dedicated his life to the company so that the bimbo next door could ensure the Apple logo is visible in her bathroom mirror selfie.

I'm the effervescent kind who can't ignore too many surrounding matters. However, earlier today I was talking to a friend who gave me a piece of apparently Captain Obvious, but actually priceless advice - "make sure you learn something from radios that don't play static noise."

The time of intelligent cars that drive themselves awaits us, but some people will always be as stupid as they've always been. How can you spot those among them who have learned how to hide it? For one thing, they'd be ready to buy self-driving Ferraris.
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About the author: Andrei Tutu
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In his quest to bring you the most impressive automotive creations, Andrei relies on learning as a superpower. There's quite a bit of room in the garage that is this aficionado's heart, so factory-condition classics and widebody contraptions with turbos poking through the hood can peacefully coexist.
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