Pigeons and cars have been enemies for ages. Just wash your vehicle with tenderness, love, and care and park it to watch crappy attacks from these flying vandals to all your work and your car’s paint job. Leave the mess pigeons generated with their acid droppings, and you’ll have a massive problem as time goes by. Some think that is random, while others believe pigeons have an attack plan. Nissan reinforced that theory in 1997 with a fantastic commercial.
The company created this advertisement to be aired during Super Bowl XXXI. It starts with a meeting in the pigeons’ headquarters, where they plan their next strike. The commander, Dirty Bird, makes a motivational speech, daring his soldiers to show what they are made of and that they are more than just birds: they are pigeons!
When the mission begins at the sound of "Danger Zone" – the "Top Gun" theme – they go flying over San Francisco and the Golden Gate bridge when Dirty Bird finds the perfect spot for the attack: a car wash. Little did Dirty Bird know that the Nissan Maxima driver was alert and spotted the imminent assault. He enters his car and tries to escape as fast as possible. Sky rat has a direct order from Dirty Bird: make it messy.
It is at this point in the video that we see pigeons have a target system. Of course they did: how could they be so precise otherwise? Brazilian readers and those in Portuguese-speaking countries will remember a song called “Mundo Animal” (Animal world). You can listen to it below.
The lyrics are NSFW – as most of the songs from Mamonas Assassinas – so be sure you do not have Portuguese-speaking colleagues or bosses around. They mention that more sophisticated pigeons already have laser-target systems, with “always fatal” shots. We do not doubt that – neither did Nissan in 1997.
The Nissan Maxima persecution extends for several streets, messing with road signs, the asphalt, a mailbox, and even a wedding party in a garden. Not even the cake survives. Sky Rat then warns Dirty Bird that the Maxima is still clean. The pigeon’s commander then tries to grab the bull by the horns itself.
His target system works like crazy, never managing to take a shot until the Maxima enters a garage. Dirty Bird was so fast that it could not avoid hitting the garage door. The poor commander ends the mission asking for a medic.
Joking aside, this commercial was amazingly popular because it brought humor to a situation that makes most drivers really mad: seeing a pigeon mess with their recently cleaned cars. Nissan did not even focus on a specific product, just on a situation that may affect any driver of any car, with no exceptions. Whatever: people talked about Nissan and its brilliant pigeon commercial for ages. We still do.
To be fair, that would probably not happen if those drivers avoided parking under trees or light poles. It could be a lot worse: anyone who has ever lived in a city with seagulls knows they work with much heavier artillery.
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