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If You Need Sense-a-Life, You Should Have Used a Condom

Just before I sat here to write this piece, I got up, walked into the kitchen and then stopped suddenly because I had completely forgotten why I thought I needed to be there.
Sense-a-Life child detection app 1 photo
Photo: Screenshot from Vimeo
Has that ever happened to you? It probably has, but it's nothing to be worried about. I'm sure there's an explanation, and Alzheimer isn't it, right? Now imagine another scenario: you're driving down to the supermarket to pick up some diapers, some fruit puree and a new nipple, because, let's face it, that's what people with kids do. And since there was nobody to leave your kid at home with, you took him with you.

So he's sitting there in the back, strapped safely in his child seat, when you arrive at your destination. You park the car and with so many things on your mind (diapers, fruit puree and nipple, remember?), you forgot you had the kid there. Because, you know, toddlers are renowned for their quietness. So you leave him there and go about your business.

The only thing is, there are over 100 degrees outside, and the poor baby is at risk of suffering a heat stroke. If only you had a device in your car that could send an alert to your mobile phone reminding you that your wife would be pretty angry if she found out you accidentally barbecued the baby. Did this ever happen to you?

No, of course not, because you're not an irresponsible idiot. A baby isn't something you forget in a car - it's not exactly a bottle of water, but something you've wanted for a long time, something you love, something you've waited for nine months and which has since become the center of your life. Do you forget "the center of your life" in a car? No, and if you do, you don't need an app, you need a doctor.

And yet, there's a Kickstarter project called Sense-a-Life that promises you'll never forget the child in the car again. But what about buses, airplanes or trains? Do they come with Sense-a-Life pre-installed? Because if they don't - and I'm pretty sure this is the case - you're screwed. You're never going to be able to keep hold of your child. Every tree is going to have a "Lost kid" poster stapled on it.

Look, I'm willing to admit that enough weirdos and overly-sensitive moms are going to endorse this product, but if it also sells well, I quit. Not my job, but life itself.

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About the author: Vlad Mitrache
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"Boy meets car, boy loves car, boy gets journalism degree and starts job writing and editing at a car magazine" - 5/5. (Vlad Mitrache if he was a movie)
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