Historic Art Deco Family Home Is a Yacht On the Inside, Will Never Sail

With enough money and the right team, anyone can turn a house, regardless of size, into the dream home. Even here, we’ve covered a handful of impressive examples in this sense: virtual art galleries, entertaining venues, kids’ playgrounds, or automotive museums. This property, listed at $535,000 and located in Kansas City, Missouri, isn’t any one of those things, as you must have inferred from the headline. It’s a yacht on the inside.

The house is actually a historical building that goes all the way to 1905, when it belonged to a famous local doctor and aspiring magician. The first documentation of the place comes two years later, when said doctor, Dr. Theodore S. Blakesley, was featured in a newspaper ad for a Tuec Stationary Vacuum Cleaner.

These days, after several rounds of upgrades, the house looks slightly different, both on the outside and the inside. The exterior has been renovated but still resembles the original; the interior is a completely different story, since the entire basement and a section of the ground floor have been remodeled to look like the interior of a ship. Styling is eclectic throughout the place, but here, it’s consistent.

Measuring 2,759 square feet (256 square meters), the house has only three bedrooms and 2.5 bathrooms. Compared to other pieces of real estate we’ve covered, it’s positively tiny. However, in the basement, you will find a 12 by 32-foot (1.1 by 3-meter) pool, and an entertaining lounge made up of a billiards table and a bar, with a small restroom that is so spartan it almost beggars belief. Also here is a dining room that bears a striking resemblance to a ship’s canteen, with colorful tiles and scant furnishes, to create the impression of a much larger space.

The naval inspiration starts on the ground floor where, right in the living room, you will find a ship’s steering wheel and a set of stairs that leads to this hidden entertaining area. The nautical styling is no mistake and it’s not subtle, either. In fact, the only reason we’re even covering the house is that it went viral on reddit once the listing was posted, sparking an intense debate on whether this was the ugliest family home or quite possibly the neatest.

To be sure, based on photos alone, you do get a certain Shining vibe or, to keep up with the nautical styling, a Ghost Ship vibe from the place. Hopefully, it’s without the horror elements of either horror classic.

If yachts or boats in general are not to your fancy, the house also offers a gym area, a sunroom, a patio, a laundry room, new HVAC and plumbing, hardwood floors and “exotic wall finishes.” It also comes with a two-car detached garage and additional parking for three more vehicles, so you would never have to worry about having guests drive over.

Maritime-inspired or styled real estate isn’t novel, but this is perhaps the most unapologetic tribute to life on the water in recent years. It might not live up to today’s standards in terms of styling or even potential for comfort, but clearly, whoever did this did it with love. Think of it as the closest thing to being on a boat without actually being on one. At worst, this historic family home has incredible potential for an owner with other ideas and an even bigger budget to invest in them.