Elvis Would Love a BMW M6!

Not a day goes by without me thinking how “The King” was so cruelly taken from this world by the aliens who most likely wanted to turn “Hound Dog” into a galactic hit. Of course I still have to keep up with my day job at autoevolution while I ponder the mysteries of the universe. But when I first spotted the new BMW M6 on the Geneva Motor Show floor, I instantly knew this was the car that Elvis would buy.

Rather what I mean is that if he was in his prime, not a really old man, this twin-turbo beast would be the car for him. Obviously, his fans are going to disagree, since Elvis is a Cadillac man through and through. But let’s not forget about that white BMW 507?

Elvis’ first car in Germany was an old Volkswagen actually, which he swopped for the BMW 507 that formally belonged to racing legend Hans Stuck. The King reportedly actually wanted a Porsche Spider, since he was a James Dean fan, but this car wasn’t easy to get quickly, so he opted for the front-engined Bimmer, which was the best the Bavarians had to offer.

There, end of story - Elvis liked a BMW so he would buy a new M6 today if he had the chance! Not so fast - let me explain why the M6 fits him better than any other Bimmer!

It’s true that all M cars will love you tender, but some are better than others at never letting go. So, does that mean he wants an all-wheel drive model that never lets go? No, he’s a rebel without a cause, and he needs the right set of wheels.

Cars in the 60s might have had big wings that looked like they belonged on rocket ships, but the world has moved past that stage. Nowadays, everybody who’s got an attitude wants a body kit with a chin spoiler and a diffuser tail. What’s more, I really can’t think of another decent driver’s car that’s as oversized as the BMW M6.

From bumper to bumper, the new BMW M6 is about 16 feet long (precisely 192.8 inches or 4897 mm), which justifies calling it a whale of a car. The rear overhand is especially big, and there’s no getting away from the fact that its weight is going to go past the two ton mark once Elvis gets behind the wheel, and i’m not talking about fat Elvis here.

This is basically why I’d hold onto my money until the next M3 arrives, but Elvis is sure to love the combination of power and size. You see, this car is a bit of a mix between the Cadillac and the BMW sportscar. On the one side you have doctor Jekyll who’s all sensible about his luxury and leather, and on the other you have mister Hyde who can sprint from 0 to 62 mph (100 km/h) in just 4.3 seconds. That’s almost in supercar territory, not forgetting to mention that if you take the limited off it will do 190 mph (306 km/h).

But does the new M6 have enough “Viva Las Vegas”? Most definitely: it’s got huge wheels, lots of chrome and more exhaust tips than a Cadillac has wings. And if Elvis wanted one in every corner of the world, things would be really interesting because it comes in Singapore Gray, San Marino Blue and Silverstone. We also know a buy that can wrap it in chrome to impress that “Little Sister” the singer had his eye on.

People who have the money and want to stand out in a big opulent car will get one of these huge brutes. And BMW is more than happy to make fatter, softer vehicles to chase down buyers. I know that every carmaker’s goal is to make money, and the Bavarians still make a lot of small sportscar. Well no, they don’t! The Z4 wasn’t exactly their biggest success and they never made it hot, while the 1-Series M Coupe is a limited production model that might become a collector’s car.

OK! It might seem that I’m just smearing the rock and roll legend and BMW with satire today, but you have to ask yourself one thing: who wants a brash, 16-foot, 2-ton car with a twin-turbo V8 in this day and age? You have to be a bigger-than-life character that isn’t afraid of a being called outrageous.
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About the author: Mihnea Radu
Mihnea Radu profile photo

Mihnea's favorite cars have already been built, the so-called modern classics from the '80s and '90s. He also loves local car culture from all over the world, so don't be surprised to see him getting excited about weird Japanese imports, low-rider VWs out of Germany, replicas from Russia or LS swaps down in Florida.
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