Photo: Unknown Craigslist user via Art of Gears
When you sell something, you've got to build a nice story around it. I mean, if you're offering a good product at a competitive price, then you're good, people will want to buy it regardless, just because it's good value. But when it's a piece of junk...
And I do apologize to the person from Boulder, Colorado, who posted this sales ad for a 1985 Volkswagen Golf on Craigslist, but his car is indeed little more than trash. I realize it may hold some sentimental value for him (not the case here, but it could have otherwise been an explanation), but for the rest of the world, it's just a poorly kept Golf MkII that you wouldn't want to touch with a stick. It literally looks like it could be the source of a global pandemic.
But judging from the tone of the ad, I doubt that the owner would be upset. I mean, if you use the word "pristine" in the title, you're either a hilarious person, or batshit crazy. Either case, you couldn't care less if somebody just called your piece of crap car "trash."
Reading the ad (which, sadly, isn't online anymore), you come to realize that, just like a lot of other embarrassing situations, this man ended up with a rusty-white Golf on his hands following a bet. Well, that is if you choose to believe a word of what our man is saying, which in my opinion is a dangerous avenue to go on.
After a short story about how he came to own this conglomerate of rust that's roughly shaped like a VW Golf, he goes on to list the car's features. And it's not a short enumeration. We'll give you the whole paragraph at the end (or you can read the entire ad here, thanks to a screenshot taken by the people at ArtofGears), but let's just take some time to think about this: idle speed adjustment (clap your hands if you're old enough to remember that - or, better yet, don't, you might hurt your arthritis-suffering wrists).
For a complete list of what you're getting in exchange for $300, apart from a divorce, you can read the paragraph below. It's a good thing they took down the ad too, as somebody who was slightly tipsy might have actually pressed the "buy" button, thus prolonging this farce even further.
"Customizations include: aftermarket grille (from a Tacoma), fog lights (for when the headlights flicker), cleanly installed CB radio (antenna mount), labeled keys and buttons, alloy rims (one of which is bent pretty good), a sweet rocker switch for the fuel pump, idle speed adjustment knob, 6 disc CD changer (to be tested/installed), quick release latch for the hood (old wheel weight), and many jumper wires in the fuse box. It has the lightened rear hatch (no shocks) and has a perfectly crafted broomstick to hold the lid open while loading/unloading your favorite German keg (the old man only mentioned two serious injuries from this set up). The instrument cluster has special lighting (flashlight) for those long drives home at night. Lightweight headliner (no headliner)."
But judging from the tone of the ad, I doubt that the owner would be upset. I mean, if you use the word "pristine" in the title, you're either a hilarious person, or batshit crazy. Either case, you couldn't care less if somebody just called your piece of crap car "trash."
Reading the ad (which, sadly, isn't online anymore), you come to realize that, just like a lot of other embarrassing situations, this man ended up with a rusty-white Golf on his hands following a bet. Well, that is if you choose to believe a word of what our man is saying, which in my opinion is a dangerous avenue to go on.
After a short story about how he came to own this conglomerate of rust that's roughly shaped like a VW Golf, he goes on to list the car's features. And it's not a short enumeration. We'll give you the whole paragraph at the end (or you can read the entire ad here, thanks to a screenshot taken by the people at ArtofGears), but let's just take some time to think about this: idle speed adjustment (clap your hands if you're old enough to remember that - or, better yet, don't, you might hurt your arthritis-suffering wrists).
For a complete list of what you're getting in exchange for $300, apart from a divorce, you can read the paragraph below. It's a good thing they took down the ad too, as somebody who was slightly tipsy might have actually pressed the "buy" button, thus prolonging this farce even further.
"Customizations include: aftermarket grille (from a Tacoma), fog lights (for when the headlights flicker), cleanly installed CB radio (antenna mount), labeled keys and buttons, alloy rims (one of which is bent pretty good), a sweet rocker switch for the fuel pump, idle speed adjustment knob, 6 disc CD changer (to be tested/installed), quick release latch for the hood (old wheel weight), and many jumper wires in the fuse box. It has the lightened rear hatch (no shocks) and has a perfectly crafted broomstick to hold the lid open while loading/unloading your favorite German keg (the old man only mentioned two serious injuries from this set up). The instrument cluster has special lighting (flashlight) for those long drives home at night. Lightweight headliner (no headliner)."
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