Let me tell you a little story. Once upon a time there was this... ahem... little poor boy. He was so poor that he had to eat his cereal using a fork just so he could save milk. He also had to share every meal with his... ahem... seventeen brothers and sisters. Technically, many of the "yo mama is so poor" jokes are... ahem... based on situations that actually happened to him. Anyway, as time went by, the little boy grew up and in the end he became... ahem... this unbelievably successful business man with a ginormous fortune that even... ahem... Bill Gates' family would be envious of.
Do you know what that little boy swore as... ahem... a small child? Whether he would ever become rich or not he would never act as a poor man. Ever again. Well, guess what? I'm that little poor boy, you pricks! Did you actually expect me to get inside this... ahem... hillbilly-mobile? Me, in a Jeep?!?
Oh you guys are so full of... ahem... unpleasant surprises. Why would I ever drive a Jeep when there will always be a perfectly-good... ahem... Range Rover in my garage? Everybody knows that the British are best when it comes to off-road vehicles. Nothing can beat my matte-black supercharged Range Rover both off-road AND... ahem... on-road. Did I mention I got it custom tuned and it now sports four superchargers instead of one?
Of course, about three quarters of the engine's horsepower is used to spin the superchargers alone, but still, I got plenty of... ahem... torque at my disposal. With the upgraded pneumatic suspension and a different set of tires I can practically run... ahem... circles around this Jeep. So, this kind of begs the question, why would I choose a Wrangler for going on my... ahem... fox hunting expeditions since my Rangie is about 1327 times better?
Sure, my custom Range Rover costs about 14 times more than this 'merican piece of garbage, but hey, it's not like I can't afford it. With this being said, if you're filthy... ahem... rich you should never buy a Jeep. That is my final take on this car. Ahahaha! It's also diesel? Forgetaboutit [/end Sicilian accent]